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THE 2ND ANNUAL 10 BEST GAMES I PLAYED THIS YEAR! (12/31/2006)
POST BY: DtotheG
Let's get this train wreck a'rollin witht the No-Questions-Asked WORST game of 2006!
Family Guy (PS2)-
Hey, remember that time when Family Guy's cutaways were innovative and the show itself was well written?
Oh, that was the first three seasons. Not only is the humor reminiscient of the post-comeback FG (a couple laughs per
episode and plenty of 80's references), but the gameplay itself is dull. There was a shining moment in Stewie's levels, which
plays like a platform/shooter, like Ratchet and Clank or Jak II and beyond Brain's stealth levels flat out suck. They rely
too much on memorization and trial and error. My little Brother just asked "what's wrong with that?" Plenty. This limits the
view of the player, as well as just being too frustrating. Think of it like Guitar Hero or DDR if you were never allowed to
make a mistake. There's no room for error, and unlike the Metal Gear Solid Games, where you can correct your mistake by hiding
until the heat's off or shooting the guards.
Peter's levels are like side-scrolling brawlers. Think of it like Final
Fight or Double Dragon if instead of hitting at the right moments to beat bosses, you had to hit the right combination of
buttons to defeat an opponent. It's not only bosses that have to be dispensed with a special combo, but EVERY LITTLE HENCHMAN.
My Dad was watching me play this and HE WAS OFFENDED, more so than that
of Grand Theft Auto. In the first of Peter's levels, you have to hit old people as they come out of church, punt children,
and beat the crap out of Police Officers who turn into donuts. Once again, my little brother asked what's wrong with that.
Because there's no consequence, maybe? In GTA popping anybody in the presence of a cop will get your heat up more so
when you kill one. The only mildly creative thing was the minigames that mirror the cutaways of the show. These are fun, but
wasted, because on the show there is no loading after Peter says "You think that's bad? Remember the time <80's reference>",
and if it were to be truly like the show, one of these would pop up every minute, instead of after a level.
Now for my 10 best! You vote on the best game I played in 2006!
Resident Evil 4 (GCN)-
Wow, I think all the awesome was covered in my initial review. But to reiterate, the game is almost pure
testosterone compressed on 2 Gamecube discs. Blowing zombies to pieces with a shotgun, some scary moments and The Merchant
as well as the sweet logic puzzles make this a definite contender
Burnout 3 (PS2)-
Once again, crashing cars without consequence makes this game a hit. Got road rage? I guarentee after a
few laps of Burnout, it'll be gone, or you'll be more apt to do it. I don't know. Everything looks good enough, and the ability
to control your car after it gets crashed (and awarded bonuses for crashing into them after you crashed) is VERY welcome.
Trauma Center: Under the Knife (DS)-
Prepare your nerves for the most intense game ever. The touch screen is used to fullest with the cutting
and pinching and tapping AHBLARGABLAGABLAG! *cough cough* The game is also harder than the nerves of steel it takes to play
it. Who knew a surgery game could be so much fun? The ranking system, while biased (To get a Rank S on a procedure requires
you to not be human), adds plenty of replay value.
Elite Beat Agents (DS)-
The premise is rediculous: You help people by DANCING to music. Let's not mince words: THIS SONGLIST SUCKS.
Ashlee Simpson, Avril Lavigne, Madonna, Cher, NO GOOD GAME HAS EVER COME FROM CHER. However, this game has been able to accomplish
what Guitar Hero hasn't: making shitty songs sound good (more on that later)!! All of the songs are covered to the point where
the artists ARE BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL SONG. "La La" and "September" are my favorite stages, and the artists even made Sum 1
sound like they had testacles. What really enhances the experince of hits from the 70's, 80's, 90's and today is what every
game should be about: The gameplay. You are required to tap circles as a larger colored circle meets the border in rhythm
to the music. This is surprisingly fun, and the extra beats make the song sound fuller.
BTW, all you assholes who say "OUENDAN'S (it's Japan-Only precursor) MUSIC WAS BETTER CUZ I LOV ANIME MUSIX
J-POP LIFE I WONT BUY THIS" Good, we don't need you. As mentioned earlier, the gameplay and cover artists can malke Cher
tolerable. Overall, it's unbridled fun, and the graphics are great for a DS game.
Guitar Hero II (PS2)-
Read last year's "Best Games" but only add the fact that it has more songs, a practice mode, and FREEBIRD!!
FREEBIRD!! FREEBIRD!!!
Wii Sports (WII)-
This will be the game that sells the system. It's easy to pick up, always providing a challenge, and great
in a group of people. Wii Bowling games are a regular occassion with me and my roommates.
As far as the other games, Baseball is surprisingly good, Boxing is broken, Tennis is OK (my windup
was sometimes registered as a swing) and takes some finesse to master, and Golf is meh. Free-for-all Fun!
Contra (NES)-
Remember, Half-Life was on my list a couple years ago. This is the second manliest game ever. It has aged
very well, but it is really hard, and the UUDDLRLRBASelStart has never been more useful. There are powerups to allow you to
be a more efficient military badass, and a slowly evolving "plot" involving aliens. No complex controls to memorize, just
shoot, shoot and shoot some more. Plenty of fun and very deep.
Brain Age (DS)
Leave it to Nintendo to make what is basically homework fun. Sudoku had be addicted, and the Brain Age tests
are varied and better than the training missions (Just make sure on the Stroop test the you emphasize the oo in Blue)
Second Life (PC)
Curse thine MMORPG freeness! It's excellent for a free MMORPG, even if there are lots of furries. One thing
I find hilarious is that you find some weird ass groups, and then you find that there is actually more than one person into
that weird shit. Entrepenures and gamblers are very welcome, as it's easy to lose your money in blackjack. You can buy the
virtual money with real money and vice versa. It's actually a pretty sweet gig if you're clever enough. This game is not as
important as its hyped up to be, but it does show what a true free market looks like and what happens to people when left
up to their own devices. Plenty of artists, writers and fashion designers sell their wares in Second Life, and if it's good
enough for liberal arts dropouts, it sucks, but I like the game anyway.
MegaMan Anniversary Collection (GCN)-
I loved Megaman 2, and was just as enamored by the rest of the games. You can almost see where the people
in charge of the robot masters lost their creative edge. Megaman games, like Contra, have aged well, and now that I'm 12 years
older (I started on Nintendo early) I can actually beat it. Best of all, your memory card replaced the busted-ass password
system. Convienece, fun AND the Megaman arcade games I never heard of for 20 bucks? Bring it ON!
So there's the top 10. Happy New Year, the poll will be up as soon as you flatfoots choose between Jackie
Chan and Bruce Lee.
WELL SOD IT THEN FIGHT ME
POST BY: DtotheG
1. Zippo has happened on the XnC front for me, and I doubt PBM has done much either. I'm STILL working on
my little brother's crappy Lappy, and he has next to nothing left on his hard drive. Yeah, as much as I'd like to say "fuck
him" and re-install Flash anyway, he'd have a little shit-fit. Typical conversation-
Him: I want to install (insert name of Maple Story, Naruto/Invader Zim episode, Limewire or some buggy PSP
add on). There's not enough space left.
Me: So, the get rid of all your DDR/Kelly Clarkson/Linkin Park/Cascada/Other Shitty Songs You No Longer
Listen To. Hell, you have like 3 full length cartoons taking up 150 MB Each, and AMVs taking up a 3rd of those?
Him: Well, how about I delete Flash, AC/DC/Pantera/Blink 182/Akira The Don/Other Awesome Songs that
only take up 4 MB each, hmm? Oh, lets see, "Cowboys From Hell"... DELETE!! "Dirty Deeds"...DELETE
Yeah, I'll ask him again if I can install Flash later today, and if he agrees, you'll see an update
showing that that part is finished storyboarding.
2. I got my R4 for my DS. I'm trying some really good Homebrew, AmplituDS being great as always. The
music isn't that good (quality wise, yes, but other than that, it's just techno), but the gameplay is just like
the original Amplitude. Harmonix should hire this SOB RIGHT NOW...
3. Even the Pissed Off Webcomic Geek is suffering :(. Not so much lack of time or resources, just lack of
organization. BTW the next one is Hockey Zombie. I guess I should write a script or something. YEAH! STILL!
AN UPDATE IN THE BOX (05/29/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
No progress has been made. Sriously. That is because, my Dad refuses to fix my computer, because my little
brother's shitty laptop, which has about 7 GB filled entirely with Naruto tracks, Gir (Invader Zim's) RANDOM saying, Family
Guy BS, and episodes of the above leaving me just over 400 MB of free space to run NOTHING, works "just fine".
That, and I'll have to work at the same f--king pool club I've been dragged to for the past few years, at
less than HALF the pay I get now just laboring there. Sure, they tell me it'll be "easier", but the same logic can be applied
to video games: if it's still a shitty game, making it "easier" doesn't make it better.
THE MACHINES ARE TAKING OVER... JACK THOMPSON WAS RIGHT!! (05/19/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
No he wasn't.
1. My PC still sucks. For a little while I lost the storyboard I had for Part II of the
fight scene, but now it's found I can continue STORYBOARDING the last 200 frames. Right now, I'm working on my little brother's
PC. So, after that's done, what do I need to do?
A. DtotheG/TImmy House Living Room BG
B. Wooshy BG
C. A f--kload of rotating animations
This will be a long one.
I AM ENJOYING IT (05/10/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. The XnC Pirate shirt should be on sale soon. I just have to add the saying and work on DtotheG's and
Timmy's shading.
2. Finals time! Boo...
3. The rest of the Big Fight Scene will be storyboarded by Friday (after my finals!), and animation will
begin, after I finish my OTHER Finals (2 on Monday)
F--K YOU, WRITER'S BLOCK!! (05/07/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. My Fanboys Video went over better than expected. People actually like it.
2. The main bulletpoint here: The reason why there has been no work on XnC is that I had a bit of "storyboarder's
block". I didn't know how to handle the next part of the scene, and now I do. Work will resume, hovpefully PBM's been chugging
along.
3. I'm still getting feedback on the XnC Pirate shirt. I'd show it to you, but my PC is a piece of shit.
Not "I don't have the latest GFX card with hyper ultra-bit-render-testicular-shading and only 4 GB
of RAM with a 400 million tetrabyte HD so Half Life 2 only runs at 90 FPS instead of 120" No, I'm talking Sci-Fi, "the computer
has gained self awareness, and it's a dickwad, trying to destroy me".
No foolin'. I played WarRock earlier today, and when I got shot and died, not only did the game crash (It's
a miracle that it lasted more than 5 minutes), but I got blue-screened. I hope your happy "Guy who shot DtotheG88 (my ID on
WarRock)". You killed me so hard, you knocked me off the internet, AS WELL AS my computer. I desperately need to get a new
one, or at least find a way to make it suck less.
You know I'm actually updating on Internet Explorer instead of IE Tab for Firefox like usual? Yeah, things
are that bad.
Here's the shirt, you bastards with your computers that can go a day without getting a blue screen and can
run Second Life faster than 60 fph (frames per hour):
P.S. Sorry about the "bastard" thing. I'm angry and the profits from the store will help us get to I-Con 27.
YARR!!! (04/28/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. The new design I've been working on is now finished! I just need to make sure it's perfect, and then
upload it to CafePress... When I get home...
HALDO! THIS IS WHERE MY FUNNY WORDBOX UPDATE GOES! (04/23/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
YouTube, as much as I despise the Web 2.0 biz (I much rather prefer Kris Straub's You.0), has been the name of the game this week. I put up a couple videos:
2. Second, recently, Scott DeWitt, writer/author of one of my favorite Webcomics F@NBOY$, has asked for some criticism regarding his comic. Now, I could go the effective route, and simply say that:
- The lol gaming joke strip has gotten kinda tired. Penny Arcade started it, VG Cats did it, but in a different
way, and Ctrl Alt Del made the concept look like it was wearing thing. A new resurgence (since the Joystiq Webcomic Poll was
instituted) has shown that anyone with decent skills of an artist can just make an observation about gaming
and go LOL about it.
- Use the respective characters fanboyism as a background (i.e. Does their personality reflect WHY the love
a particular system?), not main character traits.
- Speaking of backgrounds, use 'em and make them not look like simple Flash gradients or the shit BGs that
I tend to dra- YOU TEND TO SEE BECAUSE YOU ARE CRAZY WHEN YOU WATCH XNC CAUSE YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH
- Spell wors corectly and fuly with all the letters, harcore.
But I decided to do it Angry Video Game Nerd style! Introducing:
STAGE 2...FIGHT!!! (04/16/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
Stage 1 of the fight scene is OFFICIALLY done.
Now for round 2. PBM will post here as soon as the scene is done.
Also, after doing some calculations, the first
part amounted to about 41% of the entire scene. Now I just need to "storyboard" (i.e. Write down) the scene.
Ignore the last post a.k.a. my horrible attempt
at an April Fool's Joke.
XNC LAB KEYCARD (04/01/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
Because money is tight for both myself and because XnC is actually starting to cost me money, I'll be instituting
a pay service called "The XnC Lab Keycard" It gives you full access to behind the scenes stuff, as well as wallpapers I worked
on, but didn't bother to post up so I might as well sell them. There's also several shorts availble for members. It's only
$60 a year, and I e-mail you the latest episodes before they're posted on NG! It's almost like you're getting it first! Keep
those credit card numbers handy people!
AND NOW, THE OBLIGATORY FREEBIRD JOKE (03/29/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
3. Starslip Crisis. NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT THIS? Kris Sraub is a better writer than I thought.
4. And I crossed off some things on the to do list. New Icon, new avatars, and new desktops!
WAS THAT SO HARD PEOPLE? (03/25/2007)
Post By: DtotheG
1. Jackie Chan will be on DtotheG's T-Shirt (sorta)
2. Now for the real news: I had the most awesome weekend EVAR!!! (where I did not have a threesome with
hot women). This weekend was I-CON, a convention for fantasy, lame ass comic books nobody reads, sci-fi shows nobody gives
a shit about... Oh wait, the reasons I was excited:
- I got to meet Kari Byron and Tori Bellaci from Mythbusters! They answered audience questions, and
even let you suggest myth ideas! I got their autographs and took a picture with them. Sure, it's not Adam and Jamie, and nothing
exploded, and... Why was I so hopped up about this? Ah, I had a great time!
- I bought Super Street Fighter II for Brian for the Sega Genesis.
- Free shit, like... a 300 button... and some movie posters... Yeah, this was no Digital Life. Speaking of
which, if anyone knows how to send pictures from my cell phone to my computer, e-mail me.
- I rocked out in Guitar Hero with the cast of Final Fantasy 7: Advent Children cosplayers (BTW FF7:AC FTL
:p)
- I lost a Guitar Hero tourney to some fat nerdy kid (in my defense, it was on Expert, and I'm still trying
to 5-Star Hard)
- MOST INAPPROPRIATE COSTUME: Some 300 lb+ guy as Roronoa Zolo (lol, Orientals can't say it very well). Now,
I don't regularly watch One Piece (my current rate is one episode per year, and PROUD OF IT!), I know that RZ does not fuck
around, and if you pissed him off, you'd have a scant few seconds of life left. This heffer, however, you could kick in
the balls, kick him in the back of the head, then run away, and he'd chase you for a good 20 meters before exhaustion.
- Looking at my cellphone, some other good ones were: Link, the Prince Of All Cosmos, a way-too-fat Naruto, some
Jounin from Naruto, Zabuza, Leon Kennedy and Hunk from Resident Evil 4, some Jedi with polycarbonate lightsabers,
and a zombie nurse.
- The thing practically took over my campus (I go to Stony Brook, people, we've been over this...)
I went to the gym yesterday, and all the other rooms on the floor had SOMETHING going on, wheter it be webcomic panels, or
book readings.
3. So, this has given me a goal: Aside from XnC, I'm aso a writer, planning to start up his own publishing
company, where the XnC DVDs and my book will be sold through. Therefore, next year, I want to have a booth at I-Con 27, but
I'll need your donations.
Some (overestimated, just to be on the safe side) expenses are:
- The booth going rate: $350
- $200- Misc. (Stuff we didn't foresee, plus if I decide to bring Brian and Damien, and whoever's animating
at the time up, they need to eat and drive and whatnot, booth decoration)
- Merchandise (poll will be held to determine what I sould have): $150-1000 (depending on what and how much
I need)
- ESSENTIALS: $700-$1650
- $50- PC Speakers
- $300- Large monitor to display the episodes
- ESSENTIALS + EPISODES ON DISPLAY: $1050- $2000
- $100- DVD Burner
- $50- DVD Cases
- $50- DVDs themselves
- $25- DVD Labels
- ESSENTAIALS + EPISODES + PRINT RUN OF 50 DVDs: $1275-$2225
- Camcorder: $200
- TOTAL AWESOME PACKAGE: $1475-$2425
Not all this stuff is needed, the and I updated it to give different "Tiers".
OH YES...(03/09/2006)
POST BY: DtotheG
I = PSYCHIC (03/01/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
I always say how the goddamn cavemen commercials from Geico should have their own TV Show if they're going
to ignore the car insurance part of it:
I didn't wish for this, but, hey at least I'm psychic. From now on, I'll focus REAL hard on a Taco Bell
commercial while I nail Carmen Electra and get paid a million dollars for it.
Taco Bell: It will get you laid and rich.
AT LEAST I UPDATE MORE THAN MADDOX (02/27/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. PBM/Jeff will be mosting on this site soon enough, since I'm pretty sure he won't fall off the face of
the earth or get the Asshole Disease like my previous animators.
2. Things are going mediocrely on my end. MMA Class and School have kept me busy, but I'm about 1/2way done
with the first of four stages of my scene (the huge-ass fight scene).
3. I'm in the process of writing a new theme song for XnC. It might work out, it might not. I'll see where
it goes.
WHAT'S GOIN' ON PARTY PEEPS? (01/28/2006)
POST BY: DtotheG
God I feel dirty for saying that. What's goin' down right now?
1. I'm doing the voice acting for Episode 6. Since I'm up at Stony Brook, Brian will not be doing the voice
of Timmy. However, I know my limits, so the man below (no, not Satan) is helping me out because maybe he knows some people
who fit these descriptions:
DORIS: Uppermidwestern Accent (like Coach Z from
Homestar Runner)
PHIL: Same, pretty much a deeper voice Coach Z
PET
PRO: A crosss between David Hayter (Solid Snake) and Patrick Warburton
VOICE: Angelina Joile's
Lara Croft, only the accent is less English
PETA AGENT: TBA
RABBID:
Whoever can do the best DAAAAAAA! take
MEG: I'll take any girl.
2. A nice fellow who goes by the name of PBM (or Jeff) is helping me with the animation. Hopefully he becomes
a regular!
3. I've been doing some writing on Second Life, and one of my articles (about a Sumo league in game) is
being run in the Konstrukt:
As well as Second Life Herald:
4. Speaking of writing, I'm uploading my book, Robert DiMorro: A Week Of Hell, into Second Life. You can
purchase it at my store in game:
HEROIC (01/17/2007)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. I got an elctric guitar today. The difference between Guitar Hero and the real thing is HUGE! So far
I can only play two things: The opening to Peter Gunn and Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap.
2. The Episode 6 of XnC is being worked on. I'm working on the big fight scene, and I really need people
to animate the rest of the scenes.
ZOMG XNC NEWZ? (01/07/2006)
POST BY: DtotheG
1. We are now eligible for a Web Cartoonists Choice Award. We can join the ranks of Homestar Runner, and...
Homestar Runner as fellow Flash Series who have won awards. I will have something AWESOME to show off for all of you who are
on the fence.
2. I've begun work on Episode 6 (using the Episode 7 script). In my opinion it was just better, and
more conveinient than recalling the original script from memory. It will be BADASS
3. Preorders began on the SL Version of Robert DiMorro: A Week Of Hell.
COMING SOON
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